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Friday, October 29, 2010


Physically. Geographically. Emotionally. Mentally. Financially. Friend-wise. Health-wise.I don't like where I am.
I still don't cope well with change.
I'm not sure how to adapt to this situation.
Sluggish adaptation is depressing.

Thursday, October 28, 2010

End of my World

Today, nearly marked the end of my nursing career when technically, it had never begun.
I go on Blackboard to take my Mid-term exam for Anatomy and Physiology today and I notice Unit 4 is already up. That's weird. I go to the Exams tab to take the #3 exam and it  requests a password. Oh God. I go to the quizzes to see if they had been locked up (they're no longer available when an exam is available or if the exam has passed.) The quizzes aren't there. I check the syllabus. Testing period for #3: October 20-23. FML.
I'm in shock at this point and go straight to my e-mail to message the TA to see if there is any forgiveness for someone who honestly missed the exam, expected to take it and ace it today, has a perfect track record for getting assignments in early and has a 97% in the class. I press send. The emotion cascades like Niagra Falls. I go to tell Mom and can barely spit out the words between the gasping, sobbing and profuse mucus. The mid-term is 20% of your grade. That's 2 letter grades. That's a near 100% to a C. Getting such a grade would obliterate my chances of getting into USF's incredibly competitive 2-year accelerated BSN to RN program. There's nothing I can do, but wait. I'm so depressed I try to take my mind off it by studying but just fall asleep after gorging on an enormous ice cream sundae. Waking around 4:55 pm I check my mail and am nervous to see the TA messaged me back.
He reset the exam.
That guy is so getting a heart-felt Christmas card and candy.
He could have let me fail that mid-term.
He could have ended it then.
But he didn't.
And for that he deserves the utmost appreciation.

Saturday, October 16, 2010

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Peaceful Music Lux Aurumque for Strings Lux Aurumque for Band

Both are absolutely lovely arrangements of an originally choral work by the ingenious Eric Whitacre.
What emotion he evokes in dynamics, chords, ornamentation...everything is so wonderful.
This is what peace sounds like.

Saturday, October 2, 2010

Key to Happiness

One key to my personal, fleeting happiness is competency or a sense of accomplishment.
Writing a partial introductory paragraph lifted my spirits.